As the woman beside the man and behind the scenes, I learned how to craft my own identity apart from my politician husband, which often felt like a perpetual project of dispelling the myth of what a political spouse should be.

Throughout it all, I came to understand something simple and profound: we are the authors of our own stories. The moments we chalk up to “just life,” or minimize as “something everyone encounters,” become the touchpoints that define us. They live in the dash between our birth and our death—the place where the important stuff happens.

Read More

But the reality is that most writers never get to experience the big writing retreat. And this isn’t me delegitimizing retreats - they can be powerful, transformative, and deeply nourishing. There are ways to recreate their benefits without the airfare, the price tag, or the logistical gymnastics.

Read More

Deciding to tell you story through memoir doesn’t mean that you’re ignoring what’s happening in the world. So much of what we see on the news begs us to pause, grieve, and even take action. That’s important, and however you move through these trying times is a personal choice. But, if you feel called to do so, you should always choose writing.

Read More

You are not stealing time from your kids by honoring your story. And you are not failing as a writer because your life is full. You are modeling something powerful: that creative dreams matter alongside responsibility — not after it.

Read More

People don’t avoid writing their memoir because they can’t write. They avoid it because they’re afraid of what writing will reveal. This is one of the most common fears in memoir writing. You worry your story is too ordinary. That it won’t resonate.

Read More

What keeps most people stuck isn’t a lack of talent or discipline. It’s the fear of claiming meaning in their own life. Many of us were taught to minimize, to move on quickly, to be grateful and quiet. That voice sounds reasonable, but it’s lying.

When stories go unwritten, they don’t disappear. They show up as restlessness. Self-doubt. The feeling that something important remains unfinished.

Read More

When you have a solid structure in place, you can write scenes without stopping to second-guess, leave placeholders instead of spiraling, and keep forward motion even on messy days

Read More

But here’s the truth I learned while writing my memoir, Accidental First Lady: You don’t need a clean slate to begin. You don’t need hours. You don’t need the perfect outline, the perfect desk, or the perfect plan. You just need movement. Even tiny movement. Because small steps now become massive momentum later.

Read More

Readers don’t want flawless. They want real. They want the version of you who doubted, learned, tried again, and kept going even when it wasn’t pretty.

Read More

A common mistake authors make is waiting until the book is printed to think about marketing. But effective author marketing starts long before publication day.

Read More

Forget chapters, timelines, or whether it “fits.” Just write that one moment like you’re watching it unfold on film. Think of your memoir as a conversation with one person. What do you want him or her to know. Envision your extended arm, offering your hand to the reader, saying, “Come with me. I have something to share with you, and I’m going to show you what it meant to me and why it matters to you.”

Read More

While I wrote those early chapters, I knew I still hadn’t found my starting point, but I kept writing. Momentum increased. I was getting words on the page. My early manuscript was taking shape. I knew the perfect, or at least most appropriate beginning, would reveal itself to me.

Soon, my chapters looked less like the resume I’d started with (think boring lists of events I’d endured) and more like a revelation. I was still teaching those political spouses, my future readers, but my stories were becoming revelations that other readers would also relate to.

Read More

Memoir isn’t a straight line. It’s a spiral. We move forward, circle back, dive deeper, rise again. Start where the ground shook. Then let the echoes guide your structure.

Read More

At first, I thought, Who would care about my story? But here’s what surprised me: people did. My book found its way into the hands of men and women, students and retirees, even other politicians. Readers connected not because my life was glamorous, but because I was honest about my journey. And four years later, I’m still selling books and giving interviews.

Read More

For almost 33 years, I’ve shared my life with a man who speaks faith in a language different from my own. He is Jewish. I am Catholic. Our whirlwind courtship after meeting at a beach bar had us talking about marriage within 6 months of dating. We quickly acknowledged our religious differences, and we committed to forging a path toward understand and respect of each other’s religions.

Read More

Writing your memoir can be one of the most generous acts of your life. Discover why personal storytelling matters and 10 tips to write generously.

Read More