Most people assume they can’t write a memoir because they “aren’t writers.”
But that belief is often the real reason their story never gets started.
In this post, we’re going to unpack that assumption, challenge what it really means to be a “writer,” and explore why your memoir doesn’t actually require you to be one.
Read MoreStruggling to start your memoir? Discover the 3 biggest mistakes that keep your story stuck—and learn how to stop overthinking, find clarity, and finally start writing your memoir with confidence.
Read MoreFeeling stuck on your memoir? Learn how to start writing even if you don’t know where to begin. A simple 3-step framework to overcome overwhelm and find your story’s opening scene.
Read MoreMemoir writing asks more of us than information.
It asks us to return.
To linger inside the moments we’re often tempted to rush past.
Many writers have been trained to explain, report, and get to the point quickly. That works in business writing, emails, and even essays.
But memoir is different.
Read MoreCan you be sued for writing your memoir? It’s one of the most common fears writers face—especially when telling stories that involve real people. In this post, we explore the risks, the realities, and how to write your truth with confidence and care.
Read MoreDiscover how Oscar-winning films like One Battle After Another, Train Dreams, and Sentimental Value reveal powerful memoir writing techniques you can use today.
Read MoreQuerying takes patience. Agents receive hundreds of submissions each week, and rejections are part of the process. Yet every year, memoirs find their way into the world.
Read MoreSummary tells readers what happened. It explains. It condenses. It reports.
For example:
“I was nervous about walking into the courtroom for the first time.”
“I realized my marriage was over.”
“That day changed everything.”
All true. All valid. All emotionally important.
But the reader experiences very little.
Read MoreMemoir is personal. You’re not writing about abstract ideas. You’re writing about your life. Your mistakes. Your growth. Your relationships. Your pain.
That level of vulnerability naturally triggers self-protection.
Read MoreIf you’re overexplaining, you might notice:
Over-polishing: Trying to make every word perfect kills the story’s energy.
Self-censoring: Avoiding key events or emotions out of fear.
Second-guessing everything: Rewriting or deleting scenes because they feel “too much.”
The fear is real—but letting it dictate your writing is optional. You can choose courage instead.
Read MoreAs the woman beside the man and behind the scenes, I learned how to craft my own identity apart from my politician husband, which often felt like a perpetual project of dispelling the myth of what a political spouse should be.
Throughout it all, I came to understand something simple and profound: we are the authors of our own stories. The moments we chalk up to “just life,” or minimize as “something everyone encounters,” become the touchpoints that define us. They live in the dash between our birth and our death—the place where the important stuff happens.
Read MoreBut the reality is that most writers never get to experience the big writing retreat. And this isn’t me delegitimizing retreats - they can be powerful, transformative, and deeply nourishing. There are ways to recreate their benefits without the airfare, the price tag, or the logistical gymnastics.
Read MoreDeciding to tell you story through memoir doesn’t mean that you’re ignoring what’s happening in the world. So much of what we see on the news begs us to pause, grieve, and even take action. That’s important, and however you move through these trying times is a personal choice. But, if you feel called to do so, you should always choose writing.
Read MoreYou are not stealing time from your kids by honoring your story. And you are not failing as a writer because your life is full. You are modeling something powerful: that creative dreams matter alongside responsibility — not after it.
Read MorePeople don’t avoid writing their memoir because they can’t write. They avoid it because they’re afraid of what writing will reveal. This is one of the most common fears in memoir writing. You worry your story is too ordinary. That it won’t resonate.
Read MoreWhat keeps most people stuck isn’t a lack of talent or discipline. It’s the fear of claiming meaning in their own life. Many of us were taught to minimize, to move on quickly, to be grateful and quiet. That voice sounds reasonable, but it’s lying.
When stories go unwritten, they don’t disappear. They show up as restlessness. Self-doubt. The feeling that something important remains unfinished.
Read MoreWhen you have a solid structure in place, you can write scenes without stopping to second-guess, leave placeholders instead of spiraling, and keep forward motion even on messy days
Read MoreBut here’s the truth I learned while writing my memoir, Accidental First Lady: You don’t need a clean slate to begin. You don’t need hours. You don’t need the perfect outline, the perfect desk, or the perfect plan. You just need movement. Even tiny movement. Because small steps now become massive momentum later.
Read MoreReaders don’t want flawless. They want real. They want the version of you who doubted, learned, tried again, and kept going even when it wasn’t pretty.
Read MoreA common mistake authors make is waiting until the book is printed to think about marketing. But effective author marketing starts long before publication day.
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